UPDATE: I got to visit the business teacher who might want to hire me to do the preschool logo. Even more fun, we decided that they might appreciate an illustration rather than a logo for their banner and then make a simple version of it as a logo for their letterheads. That's much more exciting! I'm gonna give him a few concept sketches and we'll see if I'm the artist for them. He's super friendly and seems much more reliable than previous possible clients I had. I'm excited!

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UPDATE: The follow-up interview was nice. The girl sure is fun to talk to. We pretty much quickly talk about the business stuff and then have a normal conversation.

Turns out the company is leaning towards someone else for the logo BUT they would like to offer something else to me that involves me doing a type of illustration. Sweet! I can do that! I love drawing WAY more than doing logos! That was WONDERFUL news to hear. Still gotta interview all the students who applied though. Either way, I'm so glad I'm putting myself out there.

As for the teacher who wants a logo for his wife's preschool, he's just chatting with the Mrs. and they'll let me know for sure if they want to work with me soon. Again, either way, I'm glad I'm practicing self-advertisment and applying for jobs. That's what I'll have to do the rest of my life, why not start now?

My poor painting for my Intro to Illustration class is taking quite a beating. I kept messing up and then my room mate accidentally spilled soda on it. I picked it up, shook it off, laughed and kept working. Considering it's been messed up on in every possible way, it's looking quite nice! I can't wait to post it, I'm really proud of it. It's also an example of how I've learned to keep going even through the hard times. I SHOULD have given up on it a long time ago but no - I want this painting! X3

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UPDATE: The interview went very well, the girl was very nice. I'll be getting a callback today to see if she wants to see me tomorrow.

Even if I don't get that job, she helped me feel a lot better so I took another job offer to make a logo for a local professor's wife's new preschool.

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You may recall this former journal [link] . To be honest, I was just trying to be positive. It was a classic case of me getting totally screwed and trying to smile about it. Now that I have hindsight, I realize that possible client was horribly flaky and very confusing. Long story short, she treated me more like some new friend she could tell her life story to than a possible employee. She would talk my ear off about her projects and how her day was going, then I would mention something business-wise or about the job and she'd freak out and remind me time and time again that I wasn't hired YET, no matter how many times I told her that I was aware of that. I think I was more serious about the project than she was. I invested a LOT of time and energy into making the drawings and painting for her, and in the end she gave me some REALLY lame excuses for not hiring me. I'm not even cocky or self-absorbed... I am telling you, they were stupid excuses.

Anyway, I pretty much forced myself to forget about it but perhaps it's still scarred me in some way that I didn't notice.

I was looking for a temporary job online and found someone was looking for an artist to make a logo for a new company. I've done that work a little before and so I applied online. I got an email telling me to call this girl to set up an appointment for an interview, so I did. She explained that the company was HUGE... like, not some dinky little shop down the corner. No, this is gonna be something that works for the government/NASA/military. I set up a time, thanked her and hung up. As the day went on, the magnitude of this job really sank in and I started to really doubt myself. I told myself last night "I'll call her tomorrow and cancel... I can't do this."

I had my Abnormal Psychology class today and we're on the chapter about stress and its influences on health. Our teacher told us a story about a study done on dogs which developed the "Learning Helplessness" theory. They kept the dogs in cages and shocked them repeatedly, and they had no way to escape. Then they were put in a place where they could escape, but the dogs just laid there and took the shocks anyway. Stupid me, the whole time I was thinking "Ooh! I should tell this story to this and this and this person and tell them to never give up!"

I went home and called the lady and told her the job was too advanced for me and I'm not sure if I could dedicate my time to it. She kept asking, "Are you sure?" and I insisted. 2 minutes after we hung up she called back and said, "I just wanted to tell you, I'm barely 19 years old and I get to be a part of this huge company that will be worth 500 billion dollars by 2010 all because someone took a chance on me. Don't sell yourself short." I chuckled and said, "You read me like a book... I had a bad experience with a former possible client that I invested a lot of time and energy into and in the end it was almost like she wasn't ever really interested in hiring me in the first place." The girl reassured me that she was serious about hiring someone and she would love to see me and my work. She really helped pull me out of my slump, so I decided to keep my appointment for tomorrow.

I hung up and remembered the story about "Learning Helplessness" and it donged on me that the story was meant for ME to hear, not someone else. I felt blind to my own weaknesses, but I smiled anyway because I felt I had been given a second chance when it comes to me believing in myself. As corny as that sounds, I believe it's important.

So I'm gonna get my nicest work together and show it to her and just enjoy the experience. If nothing else, I want to thank her for reminding me the importance of perseverance, especially in this field.

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Note to my fellow college students: Did you know you can boil food in the microwave? I found that out today and now I can make pasta! I just put some in my microwave-safe container, put my pasta and water in it, put it in for 10-15 minutes uncovered, drain it with the lid and walla! Food!! Eating whole-wheat pasta will give you nutrients and fiber which will help your poor tummy with digesting all the processed college food you eat.

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I hope my story inspired someone and my microwaved pasta helped feed someone. Best wished to you all, never sell yourself short!